Cyberparenting 101
Children need guidance to safely use today’s
rapidly changing technology. The San Diego Internet Crimes Against Children
Task Force and San Diego Police Foundation are providing tools to facilitate
healthy choices for our first online generation.
Cyberworld — Check List
- Update your filtering software. Frequently
- Talk about the importance
of keeping personal information private. Talk about the difference between
your child’s desire for privacy and
a parent’s role to protect their children. Establish boundaries.
Review and revise. Often
- Agree on supervision of computer activities with your children’s
friends’ parents. Always
- Keep computers with Internet access in a non-private space. Always
- Limit computer time. As necessary
- Talk about your values (e.g., lying and stealing) and their place in
a cyber world. Often
- Be involved. A cyber parent
is just a parent involved with his/her child’s
interests. No different than your guiding and supportive role in their
school or sports activities.
- Know your police department number.
Cyberworld — Resources
Controls and Filters
Filtering and monitoring software is affordable
and readily available.
File sharing
Teens download file sharing programs to “share” (it’s
stealing) music and videos. These peer–to–peer services (P2P) make your computer
vulnerable. P2P is currently the preferred hacker highway, which could put
you at risk for identity theft and computer viruses. It’s also a popular
method for the exchange of child pornography. Check for peer to peer programs
in your computer’s Program Files folder (PC) or Applications folder (MAC).
Uninstall them.
Gaming
Check your and your child’s banking and credit
card statements. If you suspect an addiction, get help.
History
Your computer’s browser history is a record
of Internet sites visited. Check it often. If it’s empty, someone doesn’t
want you to know where they’ve been. Visit your computer company’s
website support section (e.g., http://www.dell.com) to learn how to check browser
histories. It’s EASY.
Instant Messaging
Filtering and monitoring software is affordable and readily available.
Proxy Servers
Proxy servers allow your child to get to websites you may have blocked. Update your filtering and monitoring software regularly – these programs will usually know the latest proxy servers and add them to the list of blocked sites. Learn more about proxy servers.
Social Networking
See how it works. Establish your own profile. It is normal for children to seek privacy at certain ages. You determine when and where it’s appropriate to give. If you are a “friend” and able to view all of your child’s activity, that may be more supervision than your child wants. Many will establish a second profile that you don’t know about. MySpace members must be 14 years of age or older. Bebo members must be 13 or older.
or whatever social networking site your child uses.
User accounts
Every computer user should only access the computer through his/her own password-protected login. This allows you to establish limits and controls appropriate for each user. Until your child reaches a certain age, you may want to be the person to log her/him in each time. Only you should have “administrator” rights, allowing for installing new programs.
- For PCs, go to the START menu and select “help and support”.
Then search for “user accounts” for background information
and directions.
Cyberbullying
Ignore, Stop and Block
The lesson to ignore bullies hasn’t changed. Do not allow defensive or counter communications. Block bully access by deleting bullies from social network “friends” and instant messaging “buddy” lists.
Passwords
Teach your children to use and protect them. Passwords used for social network profiles, instant message programs, and email accounts should be shared with parents but not friends.
Respect Others
Children who learn and demonstrate respect for others must understand that it applies to their cyber lives too.
Teach your kids to tell. Then listen.
Child Pornography
Child Pornography
is “any visual depiction of a minor involved in sexually explicit conduct, not necessarily sexual activity.” Contact the National Center for Missing & Exploited Children, a national law enforcement clearinghouse or call your local police.
Child Pornography Suspicions
If you see child pornography on or offline or hear about people who are viewing or producing it, TAKE ACTION! These are crime scene images. Viewing revictimizes. Possession is a felony. Report your suspicions. Contact the National Center for Missing & Exploited Children, a national law enforcement clearinghouse or call your local police.
One-on-One Situations
Evaluate adult - child one-on-one situations. Has someone you know been victimized?
Personal Information
Sharing personal information like age, school, favorite activities, etc., provides opportunities for predators to befriend and “groom” your children. A little communication will help reduce the risk.
Sex
Talk about it. It becomes easier if you begin age-appropriate discussions early and continue. The Good-Touch/Bad-Touch program is a starting point.
Sex Offenders
The Megan’s Law website shows where registered sexual offenders live.
Sexual Abuse
If you have any suspicions, trust your instincts. Tell someone. Seek assistance. Don’t let your children or the children you know become victims. Contact the National Center for Missing & Exploited Children or call your local police.
Think before you post
Posting
Information and images made available ( “posted” )
on the Internet are available for the whole world to see and use.
Privacy
Familiarize yourself with the risks. Review information and videos with your child.
Privileges and Consequences
Create an Internet agreement with your children. Establish rules for use and the consequences for violations so that expectations are clear. Examples of contracts/agreements are available.
Spread the Word
Posting
Share this resource guide by referring others to our Web site and programs.
Additional Information
Internet Use
Get the basics.
Tech-speak
The lingo is for speed and privacy. Recognize it.
Questions
A good Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ) section is available at the National Center for Missing & Exploited Childrenís Netsmartz website. Our SafetyNet website also has convenient links to great resources.
We welcome your feedback: contact San Diego Police Foundation at 858.453.5060 or icac@sdpolicefoundation.org
